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If you were emotionally abused or neglected as a child, there is likely still a child inside of you who needs to feel safe, who needs to be soothed, and who is aching to be cherished. These are the three pillars of emotional security.


  • Emotional Security is the inner strength and self esteem that allows you to live fully and happily, with compassion and integrity, centered and grounded in your values, even when they conflict with others.
  • Some people (around six, I think), got this naturally growing up. Their parents were secure, and could instill security in their kids without even being conscious of it.
  • The rest of us had insecure parents who ranged from loving-but-preoccupied to people who disliked parenting or disliked us and let us know in one way or another.
  • If you weren’t raised by secure people, you can develop security now by consciously practicing the behaviors of secure parents with the kids who still live inside you (and who hijack your emotions or behaviors from time to time).

This site is devoted to helping you develop an inner parent who always:

♥ Protects you – By treating you respectfully and kindly and setting boundaries that keep you safe, physically and emotionally.

♥ Soothes you – Responding to your own distress compassionately, consistently, and effectively.

♥ Cherishes you – Recognizing how amazing you are, just because you are you. Knowing deep in your bones that your worth is not contingent on what you do, how you look, or what you have.